I changed my iPod's name to Titanic. It's syncing now.

When chemists die, they barium.

I know a guy who's addicted to brake fluid. He says he can stop any time.

How does Moses make his tea? Hebrews it.

I stayed up all night to see where the sun went. Then it dawned on me.

This girl said she recognized me from the vegetarian club, but I'd never met herbivore.

I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. I just can't put it down.

I didn't like my beard at first. Then it grew on me.

The cross-eyed teacher lost her job because she couldn't control her pupils.

When you get a bladder infection urine trouble.

I tried to catch some fog, but I mist.

What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus.

I dropped out of communism class because of lousy Marx.

I got a job at a bakery because I kneaded dough.

Haunted French pancakes give me the crêpes.

Velcro — what a rip off!

A cartoonist was found dead in his home. Details are sketchy.

Venison for dinner again? Oh deer!

• kolam mavukum , kadala mavukum enna vidhyasam-kanna kolam mavula kolam podalam anna kadala mavula kadala poda nudhiyatu.
• JOKE :A good way to avoid nightmares...
  Just avoid looking at the mirror before you go to bed!
  
  Joke :
  What is the difference between a terrorist and a wife?
  
  
  Answer:You can negotiate with the terrorist
• Son: dad my stomach is paining!
  Dad: that is bcoz yur stomach is empty.
  son: oh! now i understand why you always has headache dad!
  dad: ???
• In a bottle there are 10 fishes ...
  1 is taken out .. and the water level increases ... how ????
  think....

other 9 fishes are crying

• Teacher> Vaai mai Endral enna?
  Student> vaai mai endrall Lipstick ...
  Teacher> ???
• A fr Apple
  B fr Big apple
  C fr Chinna Apple
  D fr Double apple
  E fr Ennoru apple
  F fr First sonnen la antha apple

Question: You are in a boat in the middle of a river. You have 2 Cigarettes and have to light any one cigarette. You don't have anything else with you in the boat? How will you do it? Answer: Take one cigarette and throw it in the water. So the boat will become LIGHTER..... ......using this LIGHTER you can light the other Cigarette another mokkkkai answer. Scroll down a little ...... ...... ...... ........ ...... Another solution: You throw a cigarette up and catch it. Catches win Matches. Using the matches that you win, you can light the cigarette If that was not enough, one more mokkai answer.... scroll down. ....... ...... ...... ........ ...... ...... ...... Take water in your hand and drop it drop by drop....(TIP - TIP) 'TIP TIP barsa Pani. Pani ne aag lagayee.' us aag se hamne cigarette jalayee'. ...... ...... ........ ....... ...... ...... If that was not enough even uptill now, one more marana mokkai answer.... scroll down Start praising one cigarette, The other will get jealous & 'jalney lagega' ... ... ...

1.) Why did the man suddenly stopped his bike and started dancing?

Answer :- He was a break (brake) dancer.

2.) Santa and banta met after a long time. Banta found that santa was a sky diver.He asked santa whether he could learn it and Santa said yes and gave him a spare parachute and they both jumped from a 50 storey building. Banta asked santa "can i open the parachute?"

Santa said "No not now "...and this chat process continued till they came 3 feet above the ground and now santa replied to banta's 10th time repeated question as follows

"Have you never jumped from 3 feet height?Why shoul you need parachute?

3.) When the NASA's Rocket failed to start....they called for scientists' advice......But none of them worked succesfully. So, the NASA people started to accept common people's idea which didnt work either. But a sardarji offered his help and it worked. Guess what he did!!!

He asked the people there to tilt the rocked 44 degrees to the left and 20 degrees to the right and then start it. The rocket started..When the press reporters interviewed the instant celebrity how he did this....His answer was as follows

"yaar, thats how i start my scooter when it has a starting problem.!!!!!"